"Here is the perfect book for everyone who reads the last page of a book first."
- Robb Pearlman, Spoiler alert : Bruce Willis is dead and 399 more endings from movies, tv, books, and life
SPOILER ALERT! If you do not enjoy spoilers of any kind then AVOID THIS POST!
If you're more like me, and you live for spoilers, then stay a little longer. It sounds strange to say that I live for spoilers, but it's true. I quite happily nip into libraries and bookstores and flip to the last page of a book to see how it ends. And yes, I still take it home/buy it. I get so impatient for weekly episodes of any one of my current favourite shows, and jump online and read ahead. And by 'read ahead' I don't just mean finding out what happens next. I also look out for reviews, fandom opinions (haters and all), debates (that usually turn into flame wars), fanvids (some truly terrible and most really good) and, if I'm lucky enough, even cast interviews. And yes, I do the same for movies, too. I have no hang-ups whatsoever about my inability to wait and be surprised. Truth be told, even if I have read ahead/looked ahead, I am surprised when events unfold, and squeal, cry, clap and chortle as if I knew nothing. (Mostly because half the time I've forgotten what I'd read, anyway). Imagine my absolute delight, then, to find that we have a book that is all about the spoiler and nothing but the spoiler. The spoiler book to end all spoiler books. Spoilers, in fact, for everything I could ever wish to have spoiled. And, for this post, I get to pick which ones I liked/laughed at/was surprised by the most. Yay me!
Movie spoilers: Best series of spoilers about films with planes
#285 Karen Black lands the plane
#286 Robert Hays lands the plane
#287 The plane lands in the ocean
- Airport '77
#288 Hilary Swank never really lands the plane, per se, anywhere
#289 Jack Lemmon moves on to a plane where neither days nor dates hold meaning
- Tuesdays with Morrie
Life spoilers: Most unusual online spoilers that may not be spoilers (or true)
#122 Your Facebook friends aren't really your friends
#123 Nobody reads your blog
#124 Mark Zuckerberg makes billions from our inability to keep anything private
Movie spoilers: Things I had thought about in my head but never voiced aloud
#266 Darth Vader is Luke's father
- The Empire Strikes Back
#265 Luke and Leia are twins
- Return of the Jedi
#266 The kiss between Luke and Leia is, in retrospect, a little unsettling
- Star Wars
Movie spoilers: Best series of spoilers about dance films ever
#78 They all dance
#79 Some of them dance
- A Chorus Line
#80 She never stops dancing
- Red Shoes
#81 He becomes a professional dancer
- Billy Elliott
#82 They never dance again
- West Side Story
TV spoiler: Saddest spoiler ever
#36 Sam never makes it home.
- Quantum Leap
Tosca's comment: I adored the tv show Quantum Leap but, somewhere as a teen, never finished the series. So...what happened to Sam? Did he die? Did he get lost in transit? Or is he forever destined to travel time, fixing history as he goes, with Al forever at his side? I find that appallingly sad.